You might get the idea from reading the articles on this site that I have the insane notion that suffering should never be avoided. You could be forgiven for thinking this, as I constantly hammer home the point that avoiding suffering leads to greater suffering in the future. However, I do not think all suffering should be embraced.
If you are in pain, take an aspirin. If someone is mistreating you, call them on it. Don’t flaggelate yourself or do other self harm (unless you want to). The suffering I’m talking about is suffering which in being avoided creates new problems, such as: work which needs to be done, dealing with uncomfortable personality flaws, paying money you owe, taking care of hygiene, dealing with one’s fear of death, initiating an uncomfortable break-up when it’s necessary, ridding one’s worldview of comforting lies, or nipping a blossoming addiction in the bud.
The suffering I talk about is suffering which is necessary or which improves one’s life to undergo. Humans habitually avoid this kind of suffering and take the easy road through life, which almost inevitably turns out to be hollow, unfulfilling, and leaves one in a perpetual adolescence where one irresponsibly avoids the challenges of life.
Sometimes there are opportunities in life, and if one is simply scared to embrace the pain of change or do the work necessary to succeed, these opportunities are missed, and one watches one’s life slip through their fingers. This is not a good way to live life, but modern capitalism tries to keep people immature and fearful of change and vulnerability, because the ruling class benefits from people consistently taking the path of least resistance (which leads to the bottom, right where they want you).
Excellence in life does not come from indulging in every pleasure available, or putting off to tomorrow what can be done today. Life has a way of demanding some suffering or loss from someone for every gain that is made. These are the rules.
Voluntarily undergoing unnecessary suffering sounds like a bad idea, but this is a part of life that allows one to really evolve as a person. Volunary, unnecessary suffering that leads to gains (rather than pointless suffering) gives one an advantage, and should be embraced rather than ignored. There are many opportunities for growth in psychological refinement, learning new skills, exercising, dealing with people you don’t like, the list goes on. People who embrace suffering as a necessary evil and are not constantly trying to avoid it and take the easy road through life live more fulfilling lives.
So, pointless suffering is not something I advocate, but productive suffering should be embraced with an open heart, and one should solve their problems early and often. This is the position I take, and it was something that it took me 35 years of my life to realize. No one really taught it to me, although I’d heard bits and pieces of good advice. I had to suffer in my squallor before it dawned on me that embracing suffering is a good thing. It is. It really is a good thing.
